EEEUW -- FULL OF METHANE
August 9, 2008 7:41 AM Just off Yanonali, where bottom-feeders linger for migrant work, El Estero Wastewater Treatment Plant transforms raw sewage into compost and recycled water. Manager John Schoof and Supervisor Todd Heldoorn toured The Investigator through their process. A steep, 57-stair descent leads to the discharge room where city sewers deposit their pungent product for pre-treatment. An industrial separator sorts foreign objects from human waste, including dollar bills even a homeless panhandler would refuse. The Investigator was not offered a mask. Even with industrial- strength air-blowers to freshen the air, the stench of effluent is overwhelming, not least because we arrived at the end of morning rush hour, peak potty prime, said Mr. Schoof. This is, don't forget, how the streets of ancient capitals once smelled, even during the Renaissance. On to the grit chamber, where sand and gravel sinks away (destined to a landfill). Next, primary clarifiers separate "No. 1" and "No. 2." But some of the former is resilient and clings to water flow. Hence, the next After lunch, wastewater is disinfected with chlorine and then de- chlorinated before it gets pumped a mile and a half into the ocean off East Beach; dry solids are provided to fertilizer companies willing to haul it away. The problem is not El Estero, which partially sustains itself on methane gas while providing excellent service to the community. The problem is the crap that isn't being treated. Which brings us to ... • John Price, who allowed his Union 76 gas station in Montecito to decline into a dilapidated state of disrepair -- presumably to "persuade" local residents that redevelopment is the better path. • Rick Caruso, who tried to trick and bluff Santa Barbara County officials into fast-tracking his proposed Miramar development while evading environmental impact review. Caruso Affiliated's plan masquerades as a mere "extension" of the (already approved) Ian Schrager plan, yet it calls for twice the amount of asphalt paving, three times the amount of demolition and more than four times the amount of retail space; the replacement of sewer, water and electric systems (also not in Mr. Schrager's plan), toss in night lighting and sound amplification where none existed before, "ghost corridors," One or both developments may or may not be worthy additions to Montecito, but the misbehavior of Messrs. Price and Caruso should be piped to John and Todd's methane mill for recycling. • Coast Village Road Redux: No one seems to know how Coast Village Road became part of the city of Santa Barbara even though it is surrounded by Montecito and is its commercial hub. Armchair authorities cite a so-called 1960s arrangement in which the city provided CVR with a sewage system in exchange for its tax revenues. But that is not what happened. On the Ides of March in 1960, the business and property owners of CVR convened a special election on whether to join the city. Fifty-three of 72 qualified voters cast ballots; by a majority of 38 to 15 they opted to join. The "Montecito Strip Annexation" was formally adopted by the Santa Barbara City Council on April 12, 1960, as Ordinance No. CVR's business and property owners took this action -- a referendum Fast-forward 48 years. The city now extracts business license tax, sales tax, property tax and hotel occupancy tax from CVR, adding up to revenues of more than Santa Barbara officials also make decisions about CVR's destiny (such as planning) that run contrary to what the majority of CVR business and property owners desire for their community. It doesn't take a genius to calculate that this arrangement is skewed. Because CVR's business/property owners voted to annex their "strip," "I did not know that annexation was based on an election," Danny Copus, president of the CVR Business Association, told The Investigator. "People are going to take an interest in this with a view to exploring whatever works best for everyone on CVR and the surrounding community, including the possibility of de-annexation. I intend to take this up at our meetings." • To The Investigator: Alex Andberg was not happy with our recent reporting on teenagers and MySpace. "Three of the people you quoted got in big trouble and are grounded for a month. Have a magical day." Dear Alex: We're glad parents are intervening into the vulgar MySpace habits of their children. Your teenage friends should use grounded time to improve their vocabulary, grammar, usage and spelling skills. In another MySpace-related communique, Gavin, who says he just graduated from La Colina Junior High, sent an obscene e-mail reflecting an obsession with self-intimacy. He tried to do this anonymously, but The Investigator tracked him down and sent a copy to his parents. Presumably, young Gavin is also grounded -- perhaps with a lingering flavor of Irish Spring in his mouth.
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